No Last Chances

23 February, 2018

“If we knew how long a night or a day was to a child, we might understand a great deal more about childhood… it may be that, subjectively, a childhood is at least equal in length to the rest of a lifetime” 

John Berger, A Fortunate Man

Do you sometimes worry that you’re running out of time?  I’ve come to believe that a lot of the stress we create for ourselves is based on our misconception of time – and lack of it.  Especially in motherhood, which is the ultimate surrender of preference.  

Many women put their creative projects and careers on slow-motion and pour their energy in to their families.  In this process, it’s easy to fall victim to the dreaded ‘rushing women’s syndrome’ racing from the school pick up, to the supermarket, to a meeting, on the phone to a soccer game.  Trying to be all things to all people and suffering in the process.  

The impact this has on the nervous system can be brutal.  Feelings of inescapable overwhelm create stress responses in the body and it becomes difficult to switch off the flight or fight response.  The breath gets shallow and quick, the heart rate speeds up, nausea settles in the background.  

A thick fog of anxiety and internal criticism rolls across the mind.  A sense of pressure that time is running out starts to creep in.  In this state we can easily slip into a  ‘last chance’ mentality where we feel that time is speeding by… 

I’m this age and I still haven’t done A, B or C 

I can’t believe it’s 2018 already… 

I’m at this stage of my life and I still haven’t acquired X, Y or Z

Compare this to a time when you were a child having fun in a playground.  You wouldn’t have worried about the time you took to build a hut, or how long you swung on the swings.  You would have felt an abundance of time and content in the present moment. 

Observe your own children for proof of this.  They are simply here, in the now.  It is the most wonderful reminder!  

What has happened to us as we’ve gotten older that has separated us from this innocent, more content state?  

Quite simply, we have forgotten our essential nature.  As babies we arrive in the world whole.  As children we were closer to our authentic nature and so we behaved accordingly – it just felt more natural. 

It’s only as we get older that we are taught to create an identity that is independent and separate to something deeper and universal.   We get drawn into the hectic pace of life, we identify with things, and we experience the heartbreak and thrill of relationship.  

We forget that at our core we are an expression of infinite being.      

If you’ve found yourself recently scrolling mindlessly through someone else’s Instagram feed, comparing your life and swallowing down some bitter FOMO, then here are two great strategies to reconnect to your true, inner unbounded state:

  1. Meditate daily.  Meditation is the most wonderful practice for allowing the nervous system and mind to return to its natural, balanced state.  If you’re committed to improving your wellbeing in 2018, a meditation practice cannot be overlooked. 

  2. Make gratitude a daily practice – nourish your day-to-day mind set with a inspiring gratitude practice.  For fun ideas to inspire your gratitude practice, click here to join my 7 day gratitude challenge.

I’d love to hear if this blog resonated with you, please drop a comment in the box below or head over to our Facebook group ‘Gratitude is my superpower’ and share your questions or comments with other gratitude junkies. 

Lotsa love

Kate  

 

 

 

 

 

 


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